Chapter Eighteen - Coming Home - In Scott's Eyes
1999 - Mom is 50, I am 25, Julie is 22
I just got off the phone with Julie. She's in Florida, working at Club Med. She hates it, but I think it would be a fun experience, although it does sound pretty rough at times. I called her tonight to tell her I have lost 102 pounds so far here at Gary and Anita's house in Bend. I feel fantastic! When I first moved here, I weighed 532 pounds, and now only 430! Only 31 more pounds and I'll be under 400 for the first time in years! I'm so motivated to do it, to finally get in shape and move on with my life.
Working with Gary and the boys has been a lot of fun. It feels good to really work again. At first I couldn't do much of anything, just kinda sit around and hand tools and stuff to the guys so they could do the real work. But now, I'm doing almost everything, except climbing on top of the house, or under it. Setting up mobile homes is a rough business sometimes. There's a lot of dirty work involved, but I love it. It's my kind of work. And it feels great to be around a bunch of guys too. Growing up with two women, I've always yearned for more male-bonding, I suppose. And spending all day with Gary, Bobby, and the two Mikes is awesome. They're all big idiots, they make fun of me all the time, but I make fun of them back. We hang out together after work sometimes, and it's been a really long time since I've been able to do that.
When we get home, Anita usually makes us some sort of healthy dinner, and we talk about everything. She's a really easy person to talk to. And after hangin' with the boys all day, it is nice to have a good conversation with a woman. She has a lot of insights about life, and is really encouraging too. I really love being here. I don't know how I'll ever thank them for everything. They're saving my life, and teaching me how to save myself too. I joined a gym not too long ago, and I love it. My trainer isn't charging me extra because I'm such a big project, and he wants the notariety of being the one who makes a fat man thin. Fine by me, I get free training, and he's a really good guy. He's a pastor at a church too, and I've decided to try church again as a result. It's a really fun place for me, I've always enjoyed church. Mom and Julie really aren't the church-going type, but this is for me, and I like it. There's something just so comforting about it. And I feel like it helps me stay motivated. I actually started reading the Bible too, it's something I've never done before. It is very interesting to me. I'm not one of those people who would ever quote a scripture, but the information of learning the Bible is what I like. It's kind of like a study for me. Like a school project. I am thinking about going back to school and finishing some day pretty soon. At least now it seems like a reachable goal.
But for now, it's time for me to get on my bike, turn up my music, and pedal til my legs fall off. Gary and I get up at 4:30 every morning, which is way too early, but I'm used to it now. I exercise some more, and he makes us a little breakfast, then we head out for a hard day's work. I'll pray tonight that we have a good day tomorrow, that it doesn't rain again. I'll pray that I'll lose 15 more pounds this week. I'll pray for Julie, and the tough times she's having at Club Med. And I'll pray that I'll be thin and healthy soon, that this journey will lead me home, back to myself, back to life.